Yesterday we went through becoming aware of when we reject reality.
When the developer of DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) Marsha Linehan learned about the importance of radical acceptance she learned, it was not about “suppressing what you want”. It was about “radically accepting that you want something you don’t have and it is not a catastrophe”. Remember, acceptance does not mean you can’t work towards change it just means you have to accept the moment and the past as being what is.
I personally use the “willing hands” tool when I find myself fighting with reality. This is a DBT skill. It is a way of accepting reality with our bodies (because remember the brain listens to the body). If seated we simply turn hand palms up and rest them on your lap. Then say in your mind, “I’m willing to accept the moment just as it is”. And sit quietly with that thought.
You will notice when you stop fighting with reality and your anxiety comes down. Breathe into this willingness. Believe it or not, alternatives that you never have thought possible will begin to come to you in this willingness to accept reality. You might discover new ways to live with your reality, you might discover ways you have contributed to this reality, ways to give your reality to God, or even ways to improve the next moment.
It’s a simple tool to use when you feel anxious and your mind starts to spin with wanting to control or not accept the moment as it is.
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